Here is how my morning should have gone.
Wake to a beautiful smiling little girl who has slept through the night, right at 6:30. Be refreshed from my 8 hours of sleep. Have John hop into the shower then get dressed while I get the smiling pumpkin her morning milk and we snuggle for a little while. Then while daddy is walking the very patient doggies outside before they have made accidents in the house, this momma is getting dressed and ready to workout. Then daddy helps Joslyn get dressed, her cooperating the entire way, making the dressing sequence easy and quick. Meanwhile momma is in the kitchen making our new breakfast treats. Afterward, daddy, momma and darling daughter sit at the perfectly clean table and finish all of breakfast, daddy does some work at the computer while Joslyn and momma do puzzle and calendar time. Then we brush our teeth and all head out the door together, with a loving kiss goodbye.
This is how my morning actually went.
3:00 Joslyn awakes and I get up and put her back to bed
3:45 repeat first line.
5:00 wake up to Jinger getting ready to throw up in the bed next to my head, get her down off the bed in time to her her throw up on the carpet. Vow to clean it up when I get up.
6:45 Joslyn wakes up and asks to watch Dora, I get her milk and tell her no and we head back to bed together.
6:55 Joslyn asks daddy for her Clifford dog and they go on a hunt for Clifford while momma crawls back under the blanket. She is extra tired since she decided to stay up last night and finish her book.
7:10 daddy gets dressed, to walk the dogs and finds out that Jinger didn't wait for him to take her out. She has been rebelling for the last few months on going potty in the house, we think it is because she is not getting as much attention as before and that she doesn't have a yard anymore.
7:15 momma gets diaper bag ready and starts making breakfast. Daddy gets Joslyn dressed and it takes a long time, because Joslyn hates having her diaper changed and clothes put on.
7:35 we eat breakfast and momma goes to get dressed.
7:40 daddy leaves and momma finishes getting ready while Joslyn walks around with her breakfast and spills it on the floor.
7:45-7:55 momma steam cleans the 3 areas on the floors in different rooms very thouroghly. And grumbles the whole way.
7:55 -8:00 momma tries to get out the door, not forgetting anything, trying not to yell at Joslyn the whole time to come on and stop running and hold my hand and and and.....
8:05 we are on our way to the gym.
Well as you can see, my goals are not always realistic. Messes and delays are an every moment part of my life right now. Throw up and poop are much more prevailant in my life then I would like them to be. But, the important part to this story is that even though life doesn't always go how I want it, I don't let the craziness win. I shouldn't let the hardship in life make me quit, but instead let it guide me to peace. The devil has been working hard to derail me from this new goal. Sickness and difficulties keep trying to keep me from getting the motivation to go to the gym. The devil knows that this area in my life is a big surrender to me. Surrendering the comfort of the couch to having faith that God with help me achieve through the pain. The devil knows that being heavy has been my life long crutch. The one thing that I held highest in my life. The comfort from the food and the fear of change keeping me in a sitting position with God. Using it as an excuse to not move, to not be useful for him in ways that are scary. The devil doesn't want me to give up those comforts and fears. He wants me to hold onto the past instead of trusting in God. But he is just an obsticle that is nothing to God. When I started to trust Him, by completely surrendering these exercise hurts and fears and by trusting Him, I started to see these little things as chances to overcome. Sickness will not keep me down. Delay will not keep me sitting still. Fears will not crush this motivation. I am worth the change!
As we move into week 2 of exercising I have learned a little and grown a little. First I have learned that 2 hours is not as long as I thought it would be. After dropping off Joslyn in Child watch, I have exactly 2 hours to work out before I have to pick her up. That includes trekking back and forth to the different rooms and equipment and the locker room. I made it to 30 minutes on the treadmill, which is a huge accomplishment for me but that left only 30 minutes to do the rest of my planned workout before my 55 minute yoga class started. So unfortunately, I am going to have to play around with my schedule before I get it just right. I also have implemented a new breakfast plan for our family. We have spent the money and have decided to do fruit Smoothies for breakfast, since none of us are breakfast eaters, but it is way too long to wait to eat till after we get back from the gym. This morning we had strawberry, banana yogurt Smoothies, they were good, I just have to remember to make Joslyn sit at the table with them if I don't want to be cleaning her floor every morning. Also, I have decided not to push myself into the Pilates class yet. I didn't go on Monday to the Pilates and was able to have time to take a shower after my workout, and that was fabulous! I think that for sanity sake I will just do the yoga and my scheduled workouts and that means I can have a little time on Mondays and Wednesdays to shower alone and collect myself.
I hope that your year goals are going well and are moving you closer to the path God designed you on. What challenges have you had this year and are they stopping you?