This morning as I entered the gym I was apprehensive. Yesterday's Mat Pilates class had left me sore and feeling fat. I was by far the thickest person there and felt completely out of place. The people in the group seemed really nice but they also seemed like a group I wouldn't fit into. The exercises were very hard and the positions were unattainable for me. But, I was proud of myself for finishing the class and feel confident that after a good amount of time I will not only be able to do the class well, but that I will enjoy it. The classes I have chosen are not only good for me but they are calming! Having a toddler, I feel constantly stressed and overwhelmed. I wanted part of my workout time to seem like a respute. A place to destress and forget about my troubles.
This morning I walked into the yoga class and assumed that I would feel out of place again, but I was surprisingly wrong. The instructor saw that I was new and came over and introduced herself. She helped me get what equipment I would need and made me really feel welcome. I quickly realized that I had chosen the spot right next to her. Panic ensued in my brain as I realized that the whole class would see all of the moves I couldn't do. But I noticed the class was full and that I wouldn't be able to move. So I looked at it as a positive thing. I would be able to see everything she did, without having to strain or look around someone. When the class started, I was very glad to be in it. So grateful for the teacher who helped me during the class. She was clear about what she wanted me to do and I heard that the class was easier than normal from some people talking in the bzthroom, and I think that was because of me. Afterwards, she asked how I felt and told me that it would get easier if I kept coming. This made me feel good, cause I want to keep going! :-) I am going back to both classes, the mat Pilates will make me feel like I am really accomplishing something each time it gets easier. And the yoga was enjoyable and really calming. When she would talk about clearing the mind I focused on the Serenity Prayer.
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time, enjoying one moment at a time accepting hardship as a pathway to peace. Taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it. Trusting that you will make all things right as I surrender to your will. So that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with you forever in the next! Amen
After my yoga class I met my training coach and set up my new workout plan. The Y has a program called mobile fit that uses a computer system to plan and track my workouts. I put in my goals and told it when I would workout and it and she set up what machines I should use. It was really great! I am looking forward to getting on there and checking off those workouts. I was entering my goaks for the year and if I only lose 2 pounds a week, by this time next year I can be down 100 pounds! I still will have more to lose but I am super excited about that goal! I can't even fathom being 100 pounds lighter! I would then be smaller then I was when I got married!
So, please pray for me that I continue to see the value in myself enough to keep going, and that Joslyn stays healthy so I don't have to miss my workouts. PS as a side note, God has been so good to us, Joslyn has enjoyed going to the child watch facility and has not wanted to leave.
Thank you in advance for your support. I love and pray for you all to obtain your goals for this year!