Book Review- The Help by Katheryn Stockett

Let me start off by saying that I normally don't read books like this! I tend to stay away from the books that make me think about slavery or heartbreaking issues! I think about those afflicted and my heart aches for them. I have such a sensitive spirit for those who are suffering that it feels like I suffer with them. Schindler's List nearly killed me!!

That aside, I was convinced to try this book from many dear friends that have loved the movie and the book.

The Help is a book that will make you laugh, cry(a lot), become enraged, and utter words of disgust! You follow 3 main characters and many sub-characters through living life in the early 60's in Jackson, Mississippi. Segregation was alive and rampant during this time! These 3 main characters struggle to figure out the rights and the wrongs of living in this age while they harbor a secret that will change their town forever! I kept turning those pages late into the night waiting to see the fates of these women! And sometimes I felt awkward hearing the secrets of the ladies, worried that they would catch me eavesdropping! Especially about the Terrible Awful!


I know that I left you wondering about the plot of this book but I want you to read it for yourself! Every page will leave you wanting more! So hurry up readers and grab this book!

Discovery Tuesdays -Slime!

If you follow me from Facebook, you might have seen my posts about my new fun activities on Tuesdays. My friend Amey is a wonderful person with whom I feel completely myself with. She has always loved me for me and I adore her. She has been one of my bestest go to girls. When I am with Amey we have lots of fun and we share special moments. She is also very creative and inventive. She had the idea to start making stuff at home that we would normally buy and doing it as a fun project together. One Tuesday turned into 2 and now 3. I look forward to Tuesdays. Amey is great with Joslyn and her house is one of the only places that I can relax and not be completely on edge wondering what Joslyn is doing. Our first Tuesday together, we made homemade laundry soap. Amey bought the supplies and it only cost her 6 dollars and we made 3 to 5 gallons of Laundry soap!

We had so much fun doing it we decided to make something else the next week. So we thought about it and we came up with homemade playdough. It was fun to make and we split it up between the both of us. Sure we had dyed hands for awhile but we had so much fun doing it! This week we decided to make Slime! Amey's son Brayden is in second grade and loves Slime! But Amey found out how to make it at home and it is really easy.

Slime!

4 oz bottle of white or clear glue
water
1 tsp Borax
food coloring of choice

Dissolve Borax in 1 cup of water in a bowl and set aside.

 In a medium bowl pour out 4 ounces of glue.

 Add 1/2 cup of water and  a couple of drops of food coloring to glue.

 Stir glue mixture until smooth and mixed well

Add in borax mixture to the glue mixture and stir. It will clump automatically. Keep stirring until it really clumps in the middle. Pour out the excess water and kneed with your hands. It will get firmer the more you kneed it.

At the end it will look like this! Store in a ziploc bag or container and enjoy! The kiddos will have tons of fun with this and so will Mom and Dad!


So I will try and post our new discoveries as we make them. On the menu soon is colored rice, super bubbles, and homemade finger paints. Do you have any ideas on what we could make for the kids? We are also already planning ideas for Halloween treats and Christmas ideas!

My new balcony!

"Ding dong the witch is dead, which old which? The wicked witch! Ding Dong the Wicked witch is dead!" sung by the munchkins in the Wizard of OZ!
Don't ask me why that song is stuck in my head? I don't know! What I do know is that I am hearing crash, bang, boom, and country music from 9 to 5 everyday. We live in apartments and the balcony above me is getting a makeover. It wouldn't be so intrusive, except my dogs don't understand why there are shadows crossing our windows all day. Or why that banging outside sounds like a knock at the door. You can see why it might cut me to the bone to hear non stop banging and barking all day.

When they opened up the exterior of the balcony to expose the wood, I was shocked to see how rotted it was. Obviously this is why the remodel is needed, but I never knew before how unstable it really was until someone exposed it. What a synonym of my life. If you were to look at me from the outside before CR you would have thought I was stable, steady and headed on the right path. Besides my obvious eating problem, I was very involved in my church, lived a modest lifestyle, and tried to point people to God whenever I could.

               
But, I was rotting on the inside. Feeling devoid of purpose and really looking to myself to hold up the weight of all my burdens and those around me. I did not even know the damage I had sustained by the weight and pressures that life had left on me on the inside. Celebrate Recovery helped me expose the termites within that were eating away my happiness. It helped me scoop out the rotten wood of the past and replace it with fresh strong boards. God gave me support beams to hold me up like accountability partners, sponsors, and dear Christian friends, that can help me stay strong through even the toughest storms. And slowly he is painting the outside to be a beautiful reflection of Him. I am being transformed! Romans 12:2 says "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will."




What a gift it is to see through new eyes! To know that even if my paint cracks or gets weathered that I will be able to stand strong. That I am a creation of His Holiness, the King of Kings, The Perfect One. That He made me from His Hands! That he cherishes me from the tip of my head to the bottom of my toes. And I am not alone! He made you the same! He formed you in His Image! I am starting to see the value of all of His children, because of the change He made in me. The bum on the street corner, is His child! The lady at the grocery store that is holding up the line, was made by the Almighty King! The bully in the school yard is a child of the Almighty God! I used to see people through their sins and their mistakes. But now I can see the hurt and the pain in their lives. This is why I praise this program! God is doing His wonderful works right now, can you see it? Or are you too tired from holding up the weight? Are you blinded by the exterior of others so you can't see the inside? Don't live life painting a rotten board. Lets go play in the sawdust!

P.S. I am giving my testimony tonight at CR, I pray that it will bring someone closer to God. Will you pray that too?

Things that start with P!

Peanuts

Popcorn

Pumpernickel

Pickles

Peanut Butter

Pineapple

Prayers

Playmates

Particle board

Pail

Print spoolers

Precious memories

Paint

poster board

popsicles

purple

pink 

panda bears

polar bears

ptarmigan

pellet guns

please

parrot

palm

pot

punt

parade

Loopy!

So Joslyn had her first taste of Fruit Loops this morning and she loved them. I debated about buying any of the sugary cereals and keeping them in the house. But I decided a long time ago that I am not going to keep her away from all sweets. It would be impossible anyways, since my husband is a sugar addict. I just have to say that despite the deathly aura that has been hanging around our lives for awhile, we are in pretty good moods. For my friends that don't live in Oklahoma, we have had a record heat wave of like 62 days over 100 degrees in a row. Saturday a cold front moved in and it has been perfect weather ever since. We have been able to open the windows and play outside. She has played at the park and even today went swimming. What a wonderful gift God has given us. At night we need light jackets but because of the lack of water we have had, there is a shortage of mosquitoes! Hallelujah!! So forgive me if I seem a bit loopy. This week I am giving my testimony and singing at Celebrate Recovery. I am excited and nervous to be able to share what God has done in my life. What an opportunity! Thank you all for the kind words, God is so good to give me such wonderful friends! Good night you all!

Grieving!

We found out Friday night that my brother-in-law is being moved to hospice care. His end is near.

Our family has suffered a lot of lost lately. All from my husbands side of the family. It seems that grief is an emotion we are supposed to feel right now. But grief is something we fight. It is a natural emotion, yet it feels so foreign sometimes. I know for me I never know how to deal with the flood of emotions coming at me. My husband has trouble sleeping and loves to ride his motorcycle during this time so he can think out on the open road. He doesn't like to talk to grieve, but I need to talk during this time. That is the differences between women and men.

I am so grateful that I have my Lord during these times. I don't know how people deal with death without having Him. Knowing where I am going and not being frightened of dying leaves me peaceful. Knowing what is waiting for me up in heaven gives me such hope to live through the pain. So does remembering the good points of life. For example, Jimmy (my BIL) was a great man. He was compassionate and loving. He loved his family and took very good care of them. He was in the Navy when he was younger and since the Navy he has worked at the VA center, taking care of our veterans. He has 2 teenage sons and his daughter died when she was seven. What a wonderful vision I have of him reuniting with his daughter in Heaven. His wife is a wonderful woman and a she is very in love with her husband. Please pray for my family as we deal with this loss.

So how do you deal with loss? Who have you grieved for?

To Emulate or Not to Emulate

em·u·late

   [v. em-yuh-leyt; adj. em-yuh-lit]  Show IPAverb, -lat·ed, -lat·ing, adjective

verb (used with object)

1.

to try to equal or excel; imitate with effort to equal or surpass: to emulate one's father as a concert violinist (dictionary.com)

I always thought emulate meant copy but when I read the full description I was surprised at the surpass part. Secretly we all want to be better. Better at maintaining our work, better at being a mom, better than our neighbor. Nah, none of us want to better than another person. Right? Well I don't know about you but I fight that urge all the time. 

Common codependent behavior, strive for excellence! Don't let anything keep you from doing your best. Well, I would love to say that I always do my best, but that would be a flat out lie. Nobody can do their best all of the time? I would even risk saying that most people don't even do their best most of the time. 

We tell our kids to do their best but do we prepare them for failure too. If we constantly strive for excellence and then don't get it, what happens? Do you get disappointed? Do you get angry? Do you work harder? 

Unrealistic expectations is a word I hear a lot in Celebrate Recovery. It isn't until I examined my life that I realized I had some unrealistic expectations of people. I expected my husband to shoulder the weight of my issues and my baggage. I didn't even know that I was doing it.  I expected my mom to be able to be there for me anytime I wanted, when my dad left. I didn't consider the toll it took on her and how much she did sacrifice. I realized that I was setting myself up for failure if I strive for excellence in everything and of everyone. 

When someone disappoints us we need to see where we went wrong too. Were we expecting too much out of them? Were we holding that prize a little too high so that it was impossible for them to reach it? I used to do this to a coworker. I didn't mean to always, but she was so hard for me to love. We differed on so much, but what really bothered me about her was what we did the same. Everything was a competition. Who could do their work better. Who had the better car. Who looked better. Who helped others better. What a contradiction to what Christ had done for us. But, I didn't realize why we fought each other. I think I saw things in her that she did that I didn't like and deep down I knew I struggled with the same thing. Her life pointed out my failures on an hourly basis. But instead of working through them I pretended that her faults were the plank and I only had sawdust if any. What a shame! I took a potential friend and child of God and turned them into an enemy. We emulated each other to the breaking point.  

One of my big fears about homeschooling is that I will set unrealistic expectations on Joslyn and not see how I am setting her up to fail. So to combat that I am praying now for guidance and compassion. Forgiveness and boldness. She is very strong willed as a toddler and we struggle through many things right now. From brushing her hair to nap time, even the simplest things can become a battle if I let them. So I try and remember to pick my battles. Is it really important to fight with her about this? If I let her have her way is it going to be dangerous or damaging to her or what we are trying to accomplish? Most importantly, I want to remember that in failing their are lessons too. Like forgiveness, and asking for help, and compassion, and helping others because you have been there too! That is what God designed our lives to be, to help each other. That is why He lets us go through the storm instead of removing it.  

Emulating isn't always bad. It is impossible for us to not copy each other, in my opinion. Sometimes we take someones idea and make it our own or make it better. That is how most things were invented. Joslyn emulates me all the time and every time she does she is learning. Learning word sounds and numbers and emotions and reactions. For example she has learned the word NOW because mommy says pick up your cup Joslyn and when she doesn't do as told, Mommy usually adds the word now with a firm voice. Joslyn will say to me "Cracker! Now! It is funny how you don't even realize the words you say until your toddler says them. After all I picked up my talking habits from emulating those around me. And they emulated someone else. 

I am trying to learn the best home school techniques by emulating the home school mothers I know that do it well. I have gotten on a home school website and look for ideas and tools and tricks of the trade. I follow advise and give advise too. God made us each unique with different situations and different ideas. If we put our ideas together, we can come up with the best ideas. But our ideas won't work for everyone and we have to give credit where credit is due. I try and remember that the idea is no more important than the person. If it is someone's idea I ask and then if they say no, then move on to something else. God will work on their heart and He will work on you too. These are some things that I am learning everyday!